![]() He certainly looked close enough to it himself, sometimes. Sarah, who’d been here the longest, thought that maybe he worked with homeless people. Other times, he’d order fifteen pizzas every night for three days straight. Sometimes he’d order nothing for a month, then order five pizzas with everything. He never came in with anyone but the dog, and his orders were. The real question, though, was what the hell he was doing with all that pizza. They made an ominous pair, waiting in the corner for orders, but they never actually did anything to warrant us asking them to wait outside. It was just as quiet, patient, and polite as its owner, and he’d responded to the question of “Service dog?” with “I guess so,” so we left it alone. Not to mention the gigantic dog that came with him sometimes. And frankly, I had no idea how he fit all the pizza into his absurdly tiny car with his absurdly huge self. Happened often enough, with the college nearby. He never spoke above a soft, clear tone, that I did have to lean towards him a little to hear if we had a late night rowdy bunch. He’d clearly decorated it like she did too, though the strange carvings were less decipherable than “Ableists get broken kneecaps.” or “Touch it, get hit.”īut he also never met anyone’s eyes. My aunt needed a cane on bad days, and he was usually limping when he had it with him, so I tried not to be too weirded out by that in particular. Sometimes he had a huge staff with him, which I assumed was some kind of fancy walking stick. He moved like he was hiding something, his whole body shrouded by that trench coat. He’d be a model customer if it wasn’t for how unsettling the man was. He never got mad when we were taking a long time, though, and he always tipped generously. Trench Coat Guy only showed up at night, never ordered less than three pizzas, ordered ahead nearly all the time, and apologized when he couldn’t, not that an apology was a good substitute for being warned that someone needed a dozen extra large pizzas with extra meat. Sandwich shops had their people who would ask for pounds of meat on one measly bun, and eat the results without spilling. The coffee shops had their early morning people that behaved like riddles and asked for more caffeine than was legal to serve. Every food service place had its cryptids.
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